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Keeping the Conversation Constant

 


Ok, so I'm 60%-ish of an introvert, which basically means I prefer my own company or that of a small group of people compared to huge crowds. A lot of people say I'm shy, but that's not true. I genuinely feel better and more energized on my own. But sure, occasionally I get this random urge to talk to someone, be part of a loud group.

One problem I face really frequently is keeping the conversation going. Doesn't matter if it's over phone, text or in real life, at some point I just wouldn't know what to say. Now, the talk continues when the other person is more extroverted, but sometimes that feels a little weird too, and I want to go back into hiding again. I don't have anything against extroverts, but while their energy often energizes me too, sometimes it does the opposite. 

I feel like a good conversation is when all the people are able to talk at equal amounts, and are all interested in the topic, at least to a certain degree. Someone being talkative isn't the problem here. It can be hard when you talk to someone who's either shy, scared or doesn't want to talk, or all three. If you're the only person adding new points, it can become very annoying very fast. 

See, the 'perfect' or 'ideal' conversation (I really need to look up for synonyms; this is sounding repetitive) is very hard to come by. I guess that's why it's called the 'perfect' one. 

This might seem somewhat strange, but literally every two people (at least I think so) have one small thing in common. Similarities just exist. But finding them can be tricky. When I meet someone new or just haven't really talked to much, I try to cover the basic topics of hobbies and fandoms (of course). You can also ask about personality stuff, like zodiac signs, Hogwarts houses, MBTI types etc. If you guys are in the same club/school/community etc., which could be how you met at the first place, you can talk about that. One prompt can be the key to opening many doors. 

However, sometimes the similarities (or sometimes, disagreements, 'cause you guys are still interested in the same thing, just from different angles) are pretty hard to find. Maybe the ones you can see aren't big enough to talk about for long. Sometimes you just don't have the time. After all, stuff happen all the time. 

Overtime, the discussion will have to end. There's no reason to feel bad about it (I specifically added this for me haha). Eventually the words just won't go on. Sometimes it ends with a quick or long 'bye', but sometimes you just stop talking. No closure. But closure isn't always necessary. 

Honestly speaking, when I first thought of writing this (which, weirdly enough, was just a little bit ago), I wanted to add like conversation starter prompts. Then I realized they don't really help nearly as much. Trust me, I've searched up for them a bunch of times. But if they work for you, great! I personally think that is more of an immediate solution. I think it helps to understand things more, so I wrote this out. 

So yeah, that's all for now. What do you guys think? I've been reading a whole bunch of fantastic books recently, but some of them are trilogies or duologies (A Good Girl's Guide to Murder and Six of Crows), so I want to finish the entire thing before reviewing it. I also read a few standalones over the months, though, and might write something about them. Anyways, whatever happens, I'll hopefully see you guys next time!

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